Sunday, September 19, 2021

Imperial Measures (Selling England by the Pound)

I knew it would happen before long

They're going to bring back the furlong

Metres and centimetres going out of style

You give an inch and they'll take a mile

A little crown on a pint glass

Teaching fractions in arithmetic class

Forget those decimals  there's just no point

Unless you need a quarter ounce to roll a decent joint

Imperial measures

They're back again

Providing pleasure

To sad old men


 up their treasure

In  shillings and pence

Can't believe they're still around

Selling England by the pound

Petrol in gallons, not in litres

All the cops dressed as beefeaters

Union jacks on vintage Minis

When you get fined you pay in guineas

Imperial measures

A pony and a dram

I only want my cocaine in grammes

I spend my leisure time in Amsterdam

Buy kilogrammes of Afghan Brown

Then sell it to England by the pound

5280 feet

1760 yards

1000 metres in a kilometre?

That's miles too hard

For a country under pressure

Needs imperial measures

Copyright Scar Quilse/Tom Morton MMXXI