There’s some trouble I’ve been having
I can’t spell Bunnahabbhain
And I keep saying GlenmorANGIE, which is wrong.
It’s GlenMORangie I know
But my brain is running slow
I’ve been thinking about drinking far too long.
I’ve drunk Talisker in New Orleans
And Jack Daniels in Skye
I’ve mixed my Glenfiddich with Irn Bru
I’ve had pakora sauce with Jura
And Coke with my Laphroaig
American Cream Soda with Tamdhu.
It’s time to pour a glass or two
And let the liquid say what’s true
I’ve been thinking about drinking far too long
I met a man in Florida
Who swore me to secrecy
And gave me what he said was pure moonshine
It gave me double vision
Which was just as well for me
Three other folk who drank it all went blind.
I’ve used Macallan in a motorbike
To make the engine run
And I’ve cauterised a cut with
I’ve used Scapa as an aftershave
Cleaned windows with Famous Grouse
And stripped off ancient varnish with some Powers
Copyright Tom Morton 2004. All rights reserved. From the song cycle Spirit of Misadventure